Generational movement
I've started reading a new book which addresses the "life confusion" that today's woman encounters in the quest for the "happy life". I've just started reading but am curious to learn more about the perspective the mother and daughter writing team present. I am already finding myself relating to some of the case studies provided.
One concept they present is that today's woman has endless opportunities, creating too many choices to make. Therefore, there is a quest for the next best thing. Furthermore, having so many opportunities is a relatively new (less than 60 years) concept. There isn't much experience in this area.
In one narrative they explained that a mother of a 30 something had a hard time understanding this quest for the happy life. This brought back a memory of a conversation I had with my mom about a year ago. (I may or may not have blogged about it then.) She shared how her generation watched their mothers have to do what their husbands directed. There were strict roles, etc. Therefore, her generation felt that they had achieved something when they had the opportunity to do something they individually sought. Interesting, she noted that my generation is taking that one step farther engaging in those endless opportunities AND needed to be happy doing it.
Yep, I need to be happy. I just have to figure out what that means.
One concept they present is that today's woman has endless opportunities, creating too many choices to make. Therefore, there is a quest for the next best thing. Furthermore, having so many opportunities is a relatively new (less than 60 years) concept. There isn't much experience in this area.
In one narrative they explained that a mother of a 30 something had a hard time understanding this quest for the happy life. This brought back a memory of a conversation I had with my mom about a year ago. (I may or may not have blogged about it then.) She shared how her generation watched their mothers have to do what their husbands directed. There were strict roles, etc. Therefore, her generation felt that they had achieved something when they had the opportunity to do something they individually sought. Interesting, she noted that my generation is taking that one step farther engaging in those endless opportunities AND needed to be happy doing it.
Yep, I need to be happy. I just have to figure out what that means.
posted by MJ at
9:33 PM
1 Comments:
A friend (and I use that term loosely in this case) in Pennsylvania told me her secret to happiness. She stopped reading all "self-help" books and said she consciously chooses to spend her time doing the things that she enjoys. She says NO to a lot of extracurricular stuff and has pretty firm boundaries in her life. Not analyzing everything. Not caring what other people say/think/do. Just marching to her own drummer and choosing a positive/optimist attitude.
A while ago I grabbed almost all of the self-help and parenting books off my shelf and took them to goodwill. I decided that humans (not just women) have been in existence for thousands of years. Some of the earliest ones did not have books or manuals to confuse them. They lived by doing what they needed to do to survive. After great contemplation, I decided PA girl was kind of right (along with affirmation from a therapist...) and that there's no need to question the integrity of my choices. My family is healthy and safe. I am healthy and safe. And we're carving out our own traditions.
It's quite liberating to get to the place where you can "tune out" what you THINK everyone else is thinking and just care about what matters most: You and what works for you and your family. Enjoy the journey! And read more fiction, screw the self help books! :)
By
badger girl, At
9:29 AM
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